Friday Funny: A Good Fish Restaurant

I grew up in a small town – which I now love to visit.  One of my most favorite things to do when I visit is read the local newspaper.

Every Saturday, they publish nearly a full-page of “opinions.”  Now, these aren’t Op/Ed pieces or letters to the editor you might see in other publications.  These are the anonymous ramblings of local residents.

The newspaper has a phone number and answering service dedicated to taking the anonymous phone calls during the week and then proceeds to publish a full-page of VERBATUM phone messages it received during the week. . .Any topic is game.  And frequently the ramblings seem slightly incoherent.

And I. LOVE. IT.

So last Saturday evening, when I was home I tucked into the “Opinion Line” to see what gems I could uncover:

“I’d like to know why my water bill is so high.  I got the bill the other day.  I was trying to fish but I couldn’t get any fish because they can’t afford the water bill.  What is going on. . .?”

“I want to know what they did with the traffic lights. . .You have to wait about 10 minutes before they change.  My horse just can’t live that long.”

“I would like to see a good fish restaurant, like Long John Silvers.  Another good one is Red Robin.  They make the best clam chowder.”

Source:  The Daily News, Opinion LIne, 10/20/12


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