The other day I was in the Park with Mac. We were at the Boat Lake. I was stalking a previously reported Gadwall. Fortunately for me, there was another Mother and her son there feeding the ducks. This was a good diversion for Mac while I screwed around examining all the ducks.
The boy might have been three or four.
The Mother also had a dog with her. The dog seemed keen to sample a few ducks as an early lunch so there was a lot of pulling and tugging going on the entire time the kid was chucking stale bread at the mallards.
I had given up my search for the lone Gadwall. This coincided nicely with the other kid running out of bread. Mac and I moved on a few steps and the Mother, Boy, and Dog also moved on a few steps behind us. The Mother collapsed on the nearest park bench still yanking on the relentless dog’s leash.
Just about this time, I spot the pied-billed grebe and crouch down near the stroller so I can point it out to Mac. That’s when I hear the boy tell his Mother he had to use the bathroom. I believe his exact phrase was “I have to pee.”
Mac and I watch the grebe dive under the water twice and as I’m standing up, I notice the kid heading for the nearest tree. This tree was in the middle of two paths not at all obscured in any fashion by other trees or high vegetation.
And just as it registered with me that he was planning to urinate behind the tree, I hear the Mother say, “Just pull out your wiener. Don’t pull down your pants.”
The look on my face must have been priceless. Dear Gawd.